Going back to kuya bjorn’s birthday, I can’t help but reminisce my last birthday and the last few birthdays that I have experienced. For a fact, birthday is the signal that another year had passed and that a new year comes along. It’s as if a birth and rebirth of a person as an individual. Obviously, I wasn’t able to post a blog entry about my 19th birthday celebration but let me describe it in two opposing words – DISAPPOINTMENTS and SURPRISES. Yep, I have some disappointment with regards to my 19th birthday because of unfulfilled promises, no something special factor and the contraposition that as if nature had the whole world by not letting things happened as planned. But disappointments are not new for me in the celebration of my birthday. Just like what I had previously stated, parang nasanay na ako na tuwing birthday ko, maliit ang cake, busy sina mama sa anniversary nila, walang pera dahil enrollment at walang masyadong effort akong nararamdaman. It’s as if disappointments have been my companion every second day of june of the year. Yun tipong barkada kami at yun lang yung oras na nagkakajam kami na sa parating ganun ang sitwasyon ay hindi ko na siya kinoconsider as weakness but rather as just a normal thing that I must faced at the start of the day and leave it as it is when my day ends. But what is different this year that made me expected and made my disappointment bigger than the previous years is that planned didn’t go the way they suppose to go, from planned family bonding and celebration in Legazpi to nothing. It feels like I was robbed with the opportunity to experience something new, to experience something that I never experienced before and perhaps to celebrate what could have been the best birthday of my life with my family. Obviously it hurts and I am hurt but I am not blaming anyone or everyone because I understand that sometimes things don’t go the way they should, siguro nga ay may mas panahon pang nararapat at nakalaan para sa titulong ‘best birthday of my life with my family’ and personally, I blame myself because I expected to much. Tama nga naman talaga si sime, expectation hurts so better lower your expectations.
But perhaps the biggest surprise that I got from my day is that the second of June is the day when we first saw the ‘would be symptoms’ of Dan’s (my brother) sickness. I remember that we were in our room in the boarding house having a story telling when I asked Dan about the ‘swell spots(?)’ or bukol in his neck and he shared that he even have some in his head. I am personally alarmed that I asked Dan to force mama and papa to have him examined for any disease or sickness. Masaya pa kami noon, nagkkwentuhan at nagtatawanan. Dan even got the chance to roam at Embarcadero and Legazpi but we didn’t know that something alarming is unfolding without us the knowing. Days later, he was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia which is for me, the hardest and the worst family challenge we are currently facing. Nakakabigla na tipong in just one click, something can change or perhaps everything change. But still I am quite optimistic that everything will be all right and will soon be back to normal. Pano ba yan? Happy Birthday na lang kuya BEEjorn and may God bless you always!
Postscript: All the things mentioned made my 19th birthday deserve the title, my best and worst birthday so far.
1 comments:
ahahaha. ang galing sa math. :)
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